I am regrouping

10-29-13

Clearly the reports are not ready yet if I have time for another note.

I know Ken will be disappointed but it is done, and I already feel better. I emailed the PTA president and stepped down from my post as newsletter chick. I just can’t. I see these giant folders on my desk of old newsletters and I am sure I would be amazing at it, but I just don’t have the time. I can’t even find time to start, let alone do the whole thing. I am behind on housework. I am behind on soccer stuff. I am behind on Steve. I am behind on everything I want to be doing.

I know that all of this is due to the house stuff. I knew it would be like this. I got so excited about this school that has a real PTA that I wanted to be a part of it. The problem is, I bit off more than I can chew. I have a mouthful of responsibilities and no water to wash it down. I am gonna choke!

So I resigned. I am glad I did. I felt I owed it to the school to bail out before we got too far into the year. Plus, as my president pointed out, I can still help out on events, which is something I would rather do anyway. I am going to help at the Hoedown night and other things coming up. I feel bad, but I think it is better for everyone in my life if I don’t have another panic attack.

Yeah, I had a pretty bad one a couple days ago. I even took to wearing my Hunger Games necklace that holds my Xanax. I only took one, but I don’t want to have to rely on that. I am a bundle of emotion these days along with sore and tired from all the work. I don’t need to add crazy to the mix.

I should also get out the treasurer game, but for now I will hold on. At the very least, I want to make the transition to online, which will make everything go smoother in the future for anyone in the position. If I can get everything all moved over, I will have handled all of my responsibilities.  

I have three more weeks of soccer games (not counting any post season play) and then the holiday season. I want so badly to be Monica and do my hosting, but I need to be realistic and just get settled. I want to see my friends more often than I have been. I want to have play dates. I want to be able to walk my dog. I see the end, but I must be having one of those high strung days.

I feel good now. I feel positive. I know this is just me regrouping and then I can go strong again. I just needed that minute.