the blues

5-10-13

Oh, I guess I didn’t write one yet.

To be honest, I am not feeling warm and fuzzy right now. In the past couple days I have had more anxiety attacks than I would like and an almost complete breakdown at the school yesterday. I realized that I had forgotten to get the teachers flowers as per the instructions for the Thursday gift for each teacher on Teacher Appreciation Week. I had been really good on everything else but for some reason this one managed to slip my mind. Let’s just say I was glad I had on sunglasses.

Of course, it didn’t help that this was right after two incredibly frustrating situations including trying to navigate 3 bikes into a small doorway. I was spent. Both boys even asked me separately if I was sick or something because as Bobby put it, “I wasn’t as talkative” and Dax said, “Your voice is lower”. My depression was seeping out.

I put it to good use and started cleaning. I cleaned the kitchen, did a bunch of laundry, cleaned the bathroom and did a bunch of other things. I did all of this in maybe an hour. It was crazy. The boys thanked me profusely for cleaning the house, which was odd. I mean, sure, it was nice, but it was odd.

Ken had to run to the store to get milk and he returned with multiple six packs of apple cider for me. He had also noted my blues and clearly tried to cheer me as best he could. The issue was that I knew that there was a ton wrong, but I wasn’t sure if I could put my finger on any of it.

I can chalk some of it up to hormones since my body has finally figured out that it was a good week late on my womanly time. I may have extra crazy stored up.

On the plus side, it looks as though this evening may be better what with dinner at Cozy’s happening with my folks in celebration of Ken’s birthday. I am just happy because it is Cozy’s. Hell, I may even treat myself with a margarita. Woo!

Now I am just counting down the hours till noon when I get to bail from work. Fridays in May the boys get out at noon thirty which although could be considered inconvenient to most, I find delightful as it means I can leave even earlier than normal. I am considering taking the boys to lunch, although I think I will instead just get them and come home. Maybe I can work on more housework.