Fame Whore

7-7-11




I got to be on the radio this morning. I don’t know why this is one of those things that makes me giddy. Sure, I have been listening to Kevin and Bean since they first came on the air so many years ago. I have been on the air before, been down to their studio, met the guys and prefer people to not talk to me between the hours of 5:00 AM and 10:00 AM. I am a radio junkie.



There is more to it. I am a fame whore. It’s true. I am just like the statistics that show that teenagers would rather be famous than rich. I help prove the reason for how there are limitless contestants for reality television. I want to be the center of attention, despite how much it terrifies me.



What is that all about?



In my life, I have mostly felt like the sidekick. I know there was a time when I wasn’t, but ultimately I feel like the Robin to Batman, the Jackie to JFK, Donkey to Shrek. I feel as though even though yes, I have redeeming qualities, they will always be over shadowed by someone else.



It is possible this is all in my head. That doesn’t make it any less of an issue.



I get jealous of how many people I know who have gotten to meet celebrities. Hell, Ken has been in so many papers, on the news, etc etc, it gets old. I am happy for him, as he is a perfect person for the limelight, but it doesn’t sting any less.



So my few minutes talking on the radio about random sex dreams with Huey Lewis are happy making.



I have to admit, too, that it is one of the reasons I love me some Facebook. When I post something, it is super intoxicating to have so many people reply. I feel almost famous. I try to make a point to “like” other people’s posts often since I want them to feel the same way. It is silly and sad and lame, but when you are a shy person with a desire for attention, sitting at a computer where no one can see me and be able to read numerous comments to my random posts, it can be addicting.



I am sure I will be mocked for this. But at least I recognize that it is there. I am not alone in these desires. I also have limits. I will not be on any game shows. You will not see me on Wipeout or Survivor. But when I can go on the radio and talk about some random thing, trust me that I will be there.